My wife got a job that pays her more than what I earn. I was telling a friend about it and she asked me if my ego would get in the way of my wife’s progress. She didn’t ask me in a harsh way, but it was the most obviously apparent question to that piece of information.
For long, our society has been male dominated. And it still is; but in parts. There’s no denying the fact women are making a mark in various fields. But there’s also no denying that these women form a very small piece of the pie. And one of the reasons for this is the women themselves. And I speak out of observation.
I know a girl who gave up a budding career because her husband’s family doesn’t ‘allow’ her to work. And she is unhappy about that. I also know girls who get bored at home because they have always been too dependent on everyone to do something by themselves. Now, in their early 20s, they are dependent on their husbands. And I feel that they have only themselves to blame. Don’t argue with me saying that maybe that’s what they want and are happy with it; I know them well enough to understand that they are sad about it.
The latest issue of India Today has some interesting statistics. 86% of women feel its imperative to be financially independent, yet only 77% of them would continue to work after marriage, but 47% would still choose family over career. Nothing wrong with that, but see the diversity in their statements.
The point I am trying to make, and this might sound a bit harsh, is that talking about women’s liberation is one thing and working towards is completely different thing. The females I have mentioned above are well educated savvy ones, not the illiterate village women. These are women living in cities and wearing Levis. And there are many of them. Males are said to have inflated egos because females inflate them. If you agree to be dominated then you will end up being dominated. Men don’t have any problem with the progress of women. We are not even threatened by it. In fact, the better ones amongst us treat it as a motivation to do better ourselves. And as far as I am concerned, my male ego wasn’t threatened by my wife’s bigger paycheck. In fact, I am very happy for her. She’s doing what she really wants to be doing. And in the end, the money is only going to come home.
But frankly, I did feel jealous. But then again, I would have been jealous even if it were a male friend’s salary. But the sector is different, the industry is different. And by no means, nor for any bigger means, would I ever leave what I do. I love advertising too damn much and I love words even more. I am a writer to the core. And will always be.